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Do you want to avoid conflicts in your family? Is your family currently going through a conflict? Do you want to resolve it immediately for fear that it might only get worse?
What can we do to avoid family conflicts?
There are moments when we won’t be able to avoid family conflicts. This is because people – even those who are in our family – have different traits, preferences, and personalities.
We are all created unique. None of us are exactly the same. And this is why it’s not surprising when family members argue. There are times when these arguments seem to level up, to the point that conflict inevitably arises among family members.
Some family conflicts arise because of money, religious beliefs, political views, and many more. Sometimes, even just having to decide where to spend Christmas can already be a source of conflict.
We cannot avoid these differences. What we can do is to manage or avoid these conflicts, which may potentially cause huge and lasting problems in our family. And here’s how:
AGREE TO DISAGREE
There will come a point when both parties need to settle down and just agree to disagree. This is especially true when things get heated up between the arguing parties. We need to be able to accept that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and that each and everyone of us has our own views and beliefs that we cannot simply break or change just like that.
You don’t have to accept each other’s opinions. You only have to accept the fact that both of you have different viewpoints. It may not be easy, but it’s definitely much easier than having to settle a full-blown conflict in the family.
KNOW THE NEGOTIABLE FROM THE NON-NEGOTIABLE
There are certain issues that can be talked about in order to arrive at a compromise. Unfortunately, there are certain issues that cannot. But if what you are talking about is to cheat, harm, or deceive another person, then the answer to that should be a non-negotiable NO.
But if what you are talking about is just about preferences like colors, where to eat or where to go for leisure, then maybe you can simply give way to the other person, instead of allowing the issue to be a cause of conflict.
KNOW YOUR PRIORITIES
Once you feel like you’ve had it and you’re already on the verge of exploding because of a family member, stop and think what your priorities are.
Will you put your pride and ego first just to prove that you are in the right and in the process allow yourself to come in conflict with your family member? Would you really much rather be right than preserve your relationship with your family?
Just like what I said earlier, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Yes, once in awhile, it is healthy to exchange opinions and beliefs, but to have a conflict arise out of it is not. Know your priorities, and I hope that you will prioritize your family over whatever it is that you are trying to fight for.
THINK. REFLECT. APPLY.
To avoid family conflict, you should know how to: Agree to disagree; know the negotiable from the non-negotiable; and know what is your priority. (Chinkee Tan)