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Reinforce the good stuff

Dear Manay Gina,
A dear friend often invites me to dinner get-together at her home. The problem is her cooking. It is consistently unpleasant. And it’s all the same. She spends a great deal of effort and is very proud of her cooking. Last weekend, I avoided her new recipe, which is a mix of recycled remains from her refrigerator. Refusing her dinner invitation would be refusing her friendship. I can’t tell you how many of her friends have asked me to speak to her. What to do? I really can’t eat it any more.

Glenda

Dear Glenda,
Sparing someone’s feelings need only go so far. I don’t know whether your friend’s a spendthrift, but she has to be in denial to think her cooking’s wonderful when others can barely get it down. Because people are complaining, you, as the apparent best friend, need to talk to her. Tell her tactfully that this is cooked too much/not enough and you’d love to work with her next time to help hone her skills. An intervention is definitely called for, and if you can get someone to join you, so much the better. The tack to take is that everybody loves her, but her taste buds, for some reason, are waaaay different than anybody else’s. It is one thing to humor a friend who likes to wear crazy clothes but quite another to eat things that tastes bad.

Affectionately,

Manay Gina

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“Life comes down to honesty and doing what’s right. That’s what’s most important.” – Bob Feller
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Send questions to dearmanaygina@yahoo.com (Gina de Venecia)

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