Dear Manay Gina,
My boyfriend is on a two-week business trip in Cebu. I have not heard from him by phone or text during this time.
Yesterday, I told a mutual friend I was getting angry about not hearing from him, assuming he is just too self-absorbed to bother to pick up the phone and let me know he’s all right.
Since part of his trip takes him to the home turf of a much younger, very beautiful woman he dated two years ago, our friend asked if he was going to see her on this trip. I responded that my boyfriend no longer knew where she was. At that point, the friend said that wasn’t true – that the ex-girlfriend had initiated contact with my boyfriend since last May, so he is well aware of where she is.
I am wondering how to react when my boyfriend gets home – first, how to address the fact that he didn’t bother to contact me for two weeks, and second, how to raise the issue of whether he saw this woman.
As to what to do, try the following: Upon his return, ask casually, and with no heat, about the absence of communication during his trip. Then, inquire if he saw the old flame… the younger, very beautiful one. If he would use the I-don’t-even-have-her-cell-number excuse, and his reason for no contact sounds lame, you will know his time is up. Good judgment would suggest that, even if he begs your forgiveness, his word is no good, and he’d be a poor bet for the long haul.
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“Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.”
– Thomas Jefferson
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Send questions to firstname.lastname@example.org (Gina de Venecia)