Hi Ms. Rica,
I need your help. My girlfriend and I do the deed twice to thrice a week. Every after doing it, I feel really tired after that I just want to sleep. She doesn’t say it but I know she gets disappointed whenever I fall asleep after and not be able to cuddle and talk with her.
I want to be more awake after I finish. How can I feel more energetic and active instead of being sleepy right after?
Thank you,
P
Hi P,
A lot of hormonal changes occur during that exciting time when you’re with your girlfriend, especially at that point of no return. Both men and women release almost the same hormones during that peak. However, men seem to be more tired (and even fall asleep) right after. In fact, a recent study that came out showed that almost 50 percent of men fall asleep right after exploding! (Take note, women!)
There are a number of reasons why you feel like you ran a marathon after romping the bed. Psychologically, one primary requirement of letting go and reaching that peak is to let go of other things – fear, stress, and anxiety.
And when you’re not stressed and anxious it tends to be relaxing and put right into snooze-land. Biologically, hormones that rush out when you let that thing out include prolactin, oxytocin, and vasopressin (I know they might sound too technical for you, but these terms make you feel smarter now, yeah?)
So because reasons that make you fall asleep after the deed is mostly due to psychology and biology, it might be difficult to fight it by trying to be alert and energetic! Plus, after doing my research, it seems like there’s no evidence-based way to stay alert after releasing it all out. You could try drinking coffee, taking energy drinks, or even to jump up and down. But, there’s not much research to prove that they’re effective to keep you up after something else has gone down (pun intended.)
So let’s switch strategies. Maybe it would be better to be intimate with your girlfriend at night or during the weekends, instead of during the day when you have to cuddle with her and discuss life with her after? Right? This way, she’ll be as tired as you are and ready to fall asleep in your arms. You can always save the sweet talks for the morning after when you’re alive, alert, awake, and enthusiastic. #takeitfromthesexymind
* * *
If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram _ricacruz.
Title: The Sexy Mind Answers
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9. (Rica Cruz)
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