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Confused woman

Dear Ms. Rica:
I need your help po. I just found out that I am pregnant. The problem is, confused po ako kung kanino ang bata. I had intimate relations with my husband within the same period that I slept with another man. Ang alam ko po, only my husband came inside, the other man did not and we used protection. Alam ko po na hindi ko dapat ginawa. Pero, natatakot pa rin po ako. May magagawa po ba ako para malaman kung kanino?

Salamat po,

Hello U,
Thank you for your honesty and congratulations on bringing a new person in this world!

Una sa lahat, there’s a relatively small chance to get pregnant from sleeping with someone who did not finish inside you or anywhere near your opening, especially if he was wearing protection. When used correctly and consistently wearing protection or kapote as Filipinos refer to, it can prevent pregnancy about 98 percent of the time. So, kung sigurado ka na may proteksyon at hindi ito nasira during the deed, then the baby might not be your lover’s.

From your story, it seems that it’s much more likely that it was your husband who got you pregnant since he finished inside you. But of course, the only way you can be certain 100 percent is through paternity testing after you give birth.

Moving forward, if you are still looking for sexy time with people other than your hubby, it would be better to use the kapote to protect the fetus from getting sexually transmitted infections (STIs). You may also want to get tested, just to be sure that both you and your baby are safe.

Having said that, it sounds like you’re going through some stress and anxiety because of this whole scenario. I believe it could help if through the rest of your pregnancy, you look for people who can help you relax. Confide your worries with your most trusted friend/s. You may also ask your OB-Gyne about any pregnancy and personal health concerns that you may have. Your doctor is there to help you make healthy lifestyle choices to support you and your baby.

Kung nade-depress ka or nahihirapan, pwede ka rin pumunta sa mga counselors or therapists around you. It is important that you know that you’re not alone through this whole pregnancy. You may not want to talk to your husband about it, but always remember: People are here to support you and help you, and not to judge you.  #takeitfromthesexymind
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram _ricacruz.

Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9. (Rica Cruz)