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Orgasm di apektado ng pagsasarili

By Rica Cruz

Hi Rica:
I’m a 30-year-old woman who played a lot with herself during her 20s. Now that I’m in a relationship, and my boyfriend goes down on me, I find it hard to reach an orgasm, much more get multiple orgasms. Nung mas bata ako, I was able to get myself through without any difficulty. Is this because I’ve masturbated too much? Have I reached my peak na?

Want To Feel It Again Hello Want To Feel It Again,
Yes, you may feel like when you’ve done something over and over again, then it’s easy for you to get desensitized and not feel it again, or worse, anymore!

But don’t worry. The frequency of self-play that you’ve had in the past probably has no lasting effects on your current sexual or orgasmic ability.

It’s normal to masturbate a lot during your twenties, especially after experiencing your first orgasm. It’s something that feels good! Why won’t you not want to do it again and again? Di ba?

Though you may feel soreness or numbness at your clitoral and vaginal area after a period of time, usually, these sensations will go away, and there are no long-term negative effects.

Mahapdi lang kapag naparami. To be honest, your self-exploration can actually help you figure out your body more so that you’ll be able to pleasure yourself better (or maybe teach your partner a thing or two to make you get there?)

A lot of women experience this challenge of reaching the Big O due to a lot of factors –physical, emotional, and mental stress.

Are you going through something lately? Maybe you’re worried and thinking about having masturbated too much that it’s hindering you from orgasm. It could also be the pressure that you put on yourself to reach multiple orgasms that limits you to reach even one!

It’s also possible that you’ve had a change in the balance of your hormones which lead you to be less orgasmic at this age. Whatever it is that’s holding you back from that climax, may be discovered through self-awareness or therapy with a professional.

For now, you might want to try to focus on the pleasurable sensations and on sexy thoughts and desires that could aid in your arousal. It may also help for you to guide your boyfriend while he’s down there and tell him what feels good for you.

Do you get aroused reading erotic stories or maybe watching porn? You may use those while he’s stimulating you. It could also help if you show him how you want to be pleasured.

As always, good communication between your partner and you is a huge key into having a sexually satisfying experience.

Just remember, that whatever it is that you’re going through right now, it’s not because of the amount of self pleasure that you’ve done in the past. Don’t blame yourself for it. Relax. For all you know, maybe it’s just time for another phase of self-exploration. #takeitfromthesexymind

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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram: @_ricacruz.

Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist, Marriage Counselor, and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Psychologist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.