How to move on from a breakup

Hi Ms Rica,

Nag-break po kami ng girl­friend ko four months ago, at ngayon po ay nalaman ko na may bago na siyang boyfriend! Tinitignan ko po ang FB niya ta­pos umiiyak lang po ako palagi. Gusto ko na pong tumigil. Sana po matulungan niyo ko.

Thank you,

Can’t Move On

Hi Can’t Move On,

Masakit talaga ang makipagbreak and to end a relationship, lalo na kung hindi ka pa handa nang mang­yari ito. May mga pagkakataon that it could leave you with a big hole in your life na parang may malaking nawala at may kulang.

Kaya, naghahanap ka ng paraan para ito’y mapunan. In your case, ang pagtingin sa FB account niya at ang pagiyak ang iyong naging cop­ing.

Normal naman na masaktan ka dahil sa inyong paghihiwalay. Nor­mal din na masaktan ka dahil may iba na siya. Bukod sa masakit, pwede ka rin magalit, malungkot, matakot, at minsan, pwede mo ring makita na sinisisi mo na ang iyong sarili sa mga nangyari.

Uulitin ko, normal lang ito. At ang pagsusulat mo sa akin at pagha­hanap ng tulong ay isang positive indicator na ready ka na magmove on.

May iba’t ibang paraan for you to start to approach your feelings at to let them go. Below are some strate­gies that you can consider:

1. Self-reflection: Ask yourself why you want to know about your ex and her life. Are you looking for closure? Are you jealous of her hap­piness? Are you angry at her? Are you still in love with her? Maging aware ka sa mga sagot mo sa mga tanong na ito para maintindihan mo ang iyong pinaggagalingan.
2. Look for support: Be with your friends. Put more energy and effort into building positive relationships with the people around you who can give you support. Hindi ka magiisa.
3. Practice selfcare: Alagaan mo ang iyong mga sarili. Put yourself first in all aspects – physically and emotionally. Do what you want to do. Spend more time on hobbies that you enjoy. Be more physically active. Eat healthy. Matulog ka and rest.

Whatever you decide to do, and importante ay aware ka sa iyong intention to move on. Put your mind and heart into it and every­thing else will follow. Good luck!

With love and lust,

Rica

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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to an­swer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind.

Biography: Rica Cruz is a Li­censed Psychologist, Marriage Counselor, and, Couples and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Psychologist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.