Dear Manay Gina,
I accidentally saw my teen daughter’s diary and out of curiosity, I read it. I know it’s not right but I was able to read one of her entries. It was written after our last quarrel. To say the least, what I read shocked me. She cursed me and stated that she wished I would stay away from her and that she is only happy with her friends. I was so hurt because I thought that we have a nice relationship. She is, in general, a great daughter. Now, I’m worried that I’m failing as a mother. I am having trouble getting past this. Should I confront her?
Lily
Dear Lily,
Diaries are often, full of exaggeration and are never meant to be read by anyone else. If you will tell her that you read hers, she might be aggravated and find it a violation of her privacy.
One of the burdens of motherhood is that your kids can hurt you but you still have to bear it and carry on as a mom. Do you recall a time in your life when your daughter was five-years-old and she hated you for not buying a saw? This is probably that sort of thing. After all, she’s young and she needs growing up.
However, once, she verbalizes what she wrote in her diary, then that is the time that you get to the bottom of things. In the meantime, use your discovery to empower you to be a better mom – a more understanding and more communicative mom so that your daughter will fully understand where you’re coming from.
With affection,
Manay Gina
* * *
“Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.” – Albert Einstein
* * *
Send questions to [email protected].
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