Hi Ms. Rica,
My husband is experimental when we play in bed. There are times that he wants to make a video of us together. Meron din times na nag-susuggest siya na magpasok ng iba pang tao when we do it. Is this normal? I feel uncomfortable about this, should I give in? Or should I say no? Kailangan ko ba siya pagbigyan?
Thank you,
U
Hi U,
Thank you for your honesty. Minsan, nakakagulat nga kung makarinig ka ng mga suggestions from your husband na kakaiba, like taking videos of you, and having a three-play. But rest assured that if your husband’s intention is mainly for fun and to spice up our bedroom life, then there’s nothing to be worried about. Fantasies such as having your own DVD’s na ikaw ang starring role and having a third playmate are normal. Scientifically speaking, letting go of inhibitions during the act and the thrill of filming sexy time with your husband can add more pleasure and intimacy into your relationship, as long as you both are ready and are in control. So if your husband is bringing these things up to you, then kudos to him for being honest about what he wants and how he feels.
Now, let me ask, where are your reservations coming from? Meron ka bang doubts about your husband? Have you ever had issues of trust in your marriage? Kasi, I’m more concerned about the fact that you have inhibitions. To the extent that you see it as pagbibigyan mo ang asawa mo. So I suggest that if you’re uncomfortable, be as honest to your husband as he is to you. Tell him that you feel iffy about those things. Pwede mo rin sabihin sa kaniya na hindi mo mae-enjoy as much kung ganun ang mangyayari.
Then what? Offer a few alternatives. You may add full-length mirrors around your bedroom so he can view and watch you both during live action! You can also suggest watching sexy movies and role-playing instead of filming or having another person in the act. Talk to your husband about what else he wants. Mayroon pa jan ibang pwedeng gawin!
Brainstorming in itself of fun ways to find pleasure can be an intimate bonding session for the both of you. So open up, be creative, and have fun! #takeitfromthesexymind
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me atwww.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram: _ricacruz.
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9. (Rica Cruz)