by Rica Cruz
Hi Ms. Rica:
My boyfriend and I are recent college graduates. I was able to find a job here. Pero siya, he went and worked in the province. We never had sex po. But recently, we’re experimenting with texting naughty things to each other. We’re also talking about taking things to the next level through video chat. Concerned lang po ako, is this healthy and okay? Mayroon po bang guidelines to make sure that this is safe for us? Kailangan ko po ba magprepare?
Thank you po.
Video Virgin
Hi Video Virgin,
Your questions are interesting and helpful, especially to those like you who want to practice cyber play, or are already into it. If your concern is about the practice being normal and natural, then, yes it is. Alam mo, there’s nothing wrong with exploring your sexuality and your sexual wants, as long as you do not violate others. In your case, it sounds like you found a partner who makes you feel safe about these things, and is also willing to explore with you. These things are important in mainting a trusting relationship. So, good job to you both!
Here are some things that you may consider before going into your virtual sexy time:
• Keep communicating. You both have to establish some ground rules. Ask yourselves about your boundaries. Talk to each other about what you want and what you don’t want. Be open about what you’re unsure of. Discuss things that could make you both feel comfortable and respected and vice versa, before you start your video lovemaking. Your desires and how you feel may change through time, so it is important that you both are upfront with one another about these things.
• Check your security. Because you’ll be using the internet, you have to ensure that you’re not prone to hacking or other viruses that could give out a new dvd “scandal” for the public to consume. To be safe, try not to be identifiable by NOT showing your face and your private sexy body at the same time. If you’re going to save your chats and your videos, make sure that they’re protected too. Huwag ka rin basta basta magsend sa iba.
• Prepare. Do you know how to touch yourself? Because that’s what you’ll be doing during this video time. What do you want to show your him? Consider practicing in front of a mirror or try to record yourself to know which angles suit you. That way, you’ll be more confident by sexy video time!
These are the major things that you should think of before your video date. Although sexual adventures are unpredictable, try not to worry too much in terms of planning. Also, it’s best not to rush yourselves with these things. Take your time to explore and think about what you want for the relationship and let things happen from there. Have fun! #takeitfromthesexymind
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram: _ricacruz.
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.
