By: Rica Cruz
Hi Ms. Rica:
I have a boyfriend but we don’t want to do it pa po. Pero we play with each other (with hands). It’s my first time po to be sexually intimate with someone and gusto ko rin pong magustuhan niya ung ginagawa ko with my hands. Ano po bang kailangan ko gawin?
First Hand
Hi First Hand,
Thank you for being open and honest with me. Well, it really takes some time to learn how you should use your hands when pleasuring your partner.
Wala namang maling way to play using your hands, as long as hindi nasasaktan or uncomfortable ung boyfriend mo.
As with every advice that I give, communication is the first key step to giving something pleasurable.
So dapat, kaya mo tanungin sa kaniya kung gusto ba niya ung ginagawa mo.
It may also be better if both of you are in a comfortable position. Pwedeng nakahiga on your side facing your partner, pwede ring nakaupo ka sa kaniya, or sitting on the bed while he’s lying down.
It’s imporatant that you focus your full attention on him. If you’re sharing something sexually intimate and you focus on each other, mas nakakadagdag to sa emotional intimacy and connection niyo sa isa’t isa.
Using lubricants, such as water-based lube, lotion, or your saliva (pwede rin sa kaniya) is another thing that you should incorporate in your sexy hand play.
Mas makakatulong ang lubricant to ensure na hindi siya nasasaktan sa friction ng kamay mo and his manhood. Kaya importante to keep the hand and the manhood lubricated during play.
As for techniques on what to do with your hands aside from going up and down, you may want to try one or more or all of these (pwede namang lahat!):
– Do not forget the foreplay. Syempre, mas exciting kung may build up ng tension. You may touch him lightly first near his thighs or his torso before going down there.
– Vary your speed and pressure as your hand goes up and down. Depende sa gusto niya, pwedeng mabilis, pwedeng mabagal. Pwede ring mahigpit ung pagkakahawak or sakto lang.
– Aside from moving up and down, you may also try to twist your hand in corkscrew motions – pa-ikot!
– You may also use both hands! One on top of the other or move them in opposite directions.
– Also, you need not focus on his manhood all the time, you may also have one hand playing with his two hanging toys for added stimulation!
Again, these are just a few techniques to play using your hands. Gaya ng sabi ko, ang pinakaimportante is for you two to be open to each other. Trust each other and be comfortable enough to keep telling each other what your likes and dislikes are.
Kung kinakabahan ka pa, pwede ring makatulong if you just watch him pleasure himself. Through that, you’ll learn what he wants. Di ba? So whatever you plan to do, relax and just enjoy. In time, you’ll both figure it out.
#takeitfromthesexymind
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram: _ricacruz.
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.