Dear Inang Mahal,
I have a problem with my father-in-law. He used to be responsible and a respected churchgoer. He was even elected as a barangay leader. But about four years ago, my mother-in-law died, and the company that employed him closed. Now, he is sleeping with numerous women, including prostitutes and pretending to have committed relationships with some of them. He also seems to be sexually obsessed. He tells dirty jokes and makes a lot of sexual references in every conversation. My husband and I were uncomfortable and embarrassed because he’s not being a good role model to his apos. My husband loves his father, but he’s quickly losing all respect for him.
Lucy
Dear Lucy,
It is never appropriate to be sexually explicit around young children. Related or not, no one needs to be subjected to talks about hanging out with hookers and listening to leering remarks about women.
Your husband should talk to his father seriously about this problem before your children are damaged in any way. If you think this plan is too drastic, talk to an older uncle or good friend whom your father-in-law trusts, and who can reprimand him respectfully but firmly.
When you say that some of the girls are prostitutes and that he used to be a responsible, respected person, it is entirely possible that the misbehavior could very well be a symptom of a psychological problem. Consider this: sexual misbehavior may be (I repeat, may be) an early warning sign of dementia, and your father- in -law should seek medical attention.
Good luck.
With Affection,
Manay Gina
“It is not who is right, but what is right, that is of importance.” – Thomas H. Huxley
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