By RICA CRUZ
Dear Ms. Rica,
I am in a gay relationship with another boy. First relationship ko ito since I came out and I only know how to have anal sex kapag ako ‘yung nagpepenetrate. Minsan gusto ko din maexperience na siya ‘yung nag-eenter sa akin pero parang natatakot din ako. Sabi nya, meron daw numbing lube that helped him during his first times. Gusto ko rin tuloy subukan pero I wanted to ask first kung safe ba ‘yun or hindi. Thank you!
Lightning McQueen
Hi Lightning McQueen,
Congratulations in your coming out and being in a relationship! Even if madami nang mga tao na nag-a-accept ng kanilang sexuality and gender preference, marami pa ring nahihirapan. Madami pang kailangan gawin to achieve gender equality for the LGBT community. It is good din that you want to be in both sides of this sexual relationship. Not only the giver but the receiver also.
Ang mga numbing lube ay hindi naman talaga harmful. Pero meron mga qualities that deadens the sensors in the body. Parang anaesthesia ito but may cause a problem kapag nawala na ang effect. Anal sex and stimulation may be the source of pleasure for many men dahil ang anus ay malapit sa male prostate gland pero maaari din itong maging uncomfortable dahil thin and sensitive ang tissues dito na pwedeng ma-irritate or mapunit dahil walang natural lubrication. So pwedeng ma-push ang limits nito habang manhid at hindi kagaya kapag nararamdaman mo ay pwede kang tumigil or magbago ng pace.
I would advise na better if you try fingering the anus muna with lubricants and as you progress, keep the communication kung anong comfortable or okay lang. Pwede ka din munang magstart with anal masturbation. Meron namang toys or anal dildos n pwede mong gamitin para malaman mo kung saan ang satisfaction mo before you jump right away sa anal sex.
Bottom line is, kung gagamit ka ng numbing lube, you can miss out also on the satisfaction and also risking na ma-push beyond the limit ang iyong backdoor. Keep communicating with your partner and keep exploring. Always enjoy and be safe. Bottoms up! #takeitfromthesexymind
With love and lust,
Rica
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind
(Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist, Marriage Counselor, and, Sex and Relationships Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Psychologist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.)