By GINA DE VENECIA
Dear Manay Gina,
I work in a municipal building where I am constantly in contact with the public. Understandably, my co-workers and I are naturally outgoing types.
However, there’s this girl from another department, whose office is right next to ours, who behaves oddly when we’re around.
If I pass her in the hall, she will back up to the wall as far as she can so as not to be anywhere near me. I am not the only one she does this to.
She will walk the whole perimeter of a room to avoid me and my co-workers if we are sitting in the middle of it. It really gives me the creeps, and I’m not trying to be insensitive, but it’s getting harder and harder for me to resist the urge to look at her and ask just what her problem is.
Any tips on how to approach this diplomatically?
Jenny
Dear Jenny,
You don’t have to behave rudely just because others are. The behavior has nothing to do with any of you. If she has a phobia for people, then that is her problem, not yours.
Just think about it: Someone starts walking backward to avoid a co-worker? I hope that an acknowledgment of the strangeness will make it less an irritant and more a condition that calls for compassion and understanding. I suggest that you ignore the weird conduct with this in mind.
If this person’s behavior is affecting your work effectiveness or if it is causing a disturbance in the work environment, bring it up with your supervisor. It is her role to maintain optimal working conditions.
The person may have a problem that can be dealt with on the HR level. At any rate, it should help solve the mystery.
With affection,
Manay Gina
“To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object.” – Simone de Beauvoir
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