Dear Manay Gina,
I’m the type of girl, who easily trusts people. Months ago, I met an interesting guy who was a boyfriend material. We always dated and we talked every day for a few weeks. He also sent me text messages saying he missed me. Because we were so close, I also agreed that we have sex. Then, all of a sudden, he stopped calling, stopped sending messages, and stopped answering when I called. As to his reason for not calling, his excuse was that he really likes me but doesn’t want to hurt me. In fairness, I know that he may be transferring residence to a province. But lately, his reason changed. He just said, “I don’t want a relationship because I’ve been hurt before.” I’m really hurt and I can’t stop thinking about him. Please help me understand why this thing happened?
Mandy
Dear Mandy,
It sounds like this guy got carried away with the, uh, dates, started to firm up a relationship, and then thought better of it. I know this always comes as a shock, but there you are. Your best bet is to try to will yourself to stop thinking about him, because wishing he hadn’t backed off will not make it so. One cannot make other people behave as we’d like them to.
In the future, perhaps put the chemistry on hold and take things a little slower. Life consists of both pain and love. It is best to learn the lessons they give and move on briskly, knowing that there is likely to be someone even better and more deserving of you in the near future.
With affection,
Manay Gina
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“Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men” – Kin Hubbard
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