Hi Ms Rica,
I need your advice. My boyfriend wants a threesome. I’m open to it pero are threesomes healthy? May mga rules ba for threesomes?
Please help.
Three’s Not A Crowd
Hello Three’s Not A Crowd,
Looks like you have a very open and honest relationship with your boyfriend!
Congratulations. Now, scientifically, madaming mayroong threesome fantasies – both men and women. Though unti lang ang may lakas ng loob to make it a reality, like you and your boyfriend. Threesomes are technically fine and healthy, as long as everything is consensual and the intentions are clear to all parties involved.
The idea of a threesome may be exciting, but in reality, only a few are emotionally able to handle it after. Madaming nagseselos after a threesome kahit hindi nila ito ine-expect. Kaya, pinagmumulan ito ng problema.
Having said that, maybe it’s better if you and your boyfriend talk about WHY he wants to have a threesome. Is it because he’s curious? Or is it because he’s not sexually satisfied? Kailangan malinaw ang rason for the both of you.
If his reason is that he’s not sexually satisfied, or that he just wants to try it out, then I don’t think it would be a great idea to have someone else in the equation. But if you really want to go through with it, it’s crucial to set rules and that you both know your boundaries. Kayo ang dapat mag-set ng rules.
What are the off-limits sex acts? Can he go down on the other person? Can she give him fellatio? How about anal? What are the fantasies that you want to act out? What happens if two of the three people involved pair off and the third gets excluded? Is this person someone you both know? How about safe sex issues? How can you ensure safety? What will you do after?
These are just some questions to help you decide if you will push through with this threesome or not. I suggest that you talk, talk, talk, and make sure that your relationship is ready before going from two to three.
With love and lust,
Rica
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, follow me on Twitter and Instagram: @_ricacruz and www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.
