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Dear Ms. Rica,

We need help in our rela­tionship. Yung relationship naming ay relatively new and about three months old. Sexually active naman kami since naging kami. Pero our main problem is hindi nagrireach ng orgasm yung boyfriend ko. Wala naman problem in him get­ting an erection in the first place. Pero yung orgasm talaga problema. Kahit oral sex hindi nagwowork. Wala naman daw syang problems from his previous relation­ships. Minsan tuloy napapai­sip ako kung ako ba ang may problema. Sana po ay matu­lungan nyo kami. Thank you

Dead End

Hi Dead End,

Maniwala ka man o hindi, maraming nakakaexperience ng­ganyang issue in their sex lives. Alam kong nakakafrustrate ito­hindi lamang sa perspective mo kung hindi sa perspective din ng iyong partner. Merong iba’t ibang approach para sa ganitong mga issue depende sa reason kung bakit sya nag-ooccur.

Kapag matagal mag orgasm ang isang lalaki, tinatawag itong DE or delayed ejaculation. Um­aabot minsan ng 30 to 45 min­utes bago mag ejaculate kapag may ganitong condition. Mer­ongmga times na ang mga indi­viduals na ito ay hindi nanakaka experience ng ejaculation at all.

Minsan, may factor din na psy­chological lalo na kung may anxi­ety na or pressure to perform well during sex. I can suggest some methods para mabigyan ng attention kung ano man ang bumabagabag sa kanya. Isa dito ang pagcocondition through masturbation. Importante ito para malaman nya kung paano­ang kanyang preferences and what works for him to come. Always keep the communication open between you guys when it comes to sex. Kailangan maba­wasan ang kanyang performance anxiety or low self-esteem kung nararamdaman nya ito. Relax and chill lang din siguro dahil minsan iba talaga ang sexual expectations from reality.

Kailangan nyo din icheck if may ibang factors baka gaya ng age or iba pang medical condi­tion na maaaring nakakaapekto sa kanyang hindi pag ejaculate. For this, I suggest you go to your doctor or medical profes­sional para macheck ng mabuti at makapagbigay ng karampa­tang lunas.

Keep on exploring what works for you and your partner. Relatively new pa lang kayo together so give it time it can get better with constant com­munication. Always enjoy and be safe.

With love and lust,

Rica

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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/The­SexyMind.

Biography: Rica Cruz is a Li­censed Psychologist, Marriage Counselor, and, Couples and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Psychologist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.