First of two parts
MONEY can be at times user-friendly. The more money you have, the more friends you have. No money, no friends. Let’s see how the relationships surrounding us affect our finances. Let’s turn the spotlight to our friendships.
But wait, aren’t friends supposed to influence us to do good in life, e.g., become good stewards of our money? Well, not necessarily. This is why I want you to join me in discovering how our friendships actually impact our finance.
I gathered eight different types of friends who can negatively impact our finances. See if you can relate to some of them.
Here are the first four types:
- The intimidator
A financial intimidator or what others call the bully is someone who constantly plays you down and makes you feel sorry for your life. Most of the time, this intimidator presents his or herself as someone way better than you, financially speaking. She or he can subtly tell you: “You’re on a tight budget for a movie night, right?”
Financial intimidators thrive on being the “boss,” they find power in targeting people’s shortcomings and insecurities. And take note, even when they appear financially capable, they might actually be having a tight personal budget themselves – they just never show it. Instead of focusing on improving financial management, financial intimidators would rather change their point of focus to a different target.
- The coercer
It’s a holiday and it’s the only time you and your friends can spend some quality time together. So the coercer wants to go all out beginning the day with brunch at your favorite cafe, onto a movie date, and then finally capping the night with drinks and night out.
Unfortunately, you know very well that a whole day with your friends could mean denting your budget for the week or month. But of course, the coercer doesn’t care about that, instead, he or she will make you feel like you’re not invested in your “friendship” when you say no.
While being in this kind of situation makes you feel guilty, you need to understand that real friendships never pressure you into spending money or maxing out your credit card just for the sake of blending in.
- The activator
“You deserve that new pair of shoes because you work so hard!”; “Life is short, buy the bag!”
These are the words of the activator. Of course, activators think they are just being positive and being your friend, they want you to have a happy and great life but what they do not know is they might not be helping you at all.
Shopping with an activator friend who encourages you to spend your money even without first considering your finances and budget can be dangerous because you can eventually end up putting your money into places it shouldn’t be. Even the most dedicated savers are bound to be destroyed when purchases are justified.
- The borrower
Ibelieve we’ve encountered one in our lives. Even Facebook has so many memes about friendships destroyed because of the failure to return borrowed money.
Borrowers can be categorized into two: There are those who are actually short on money but because they don’t want to miss out on gatherings and events, they borrow money. Second, there are those who aren’t actually short on cash, they are just cheap, so when they see the chance that someone in the circle can take care of the bill, they let that person take care of it.
Have you encountered any of these two kinds of borrowers?
“Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.” – American Proverb
THINK. REFLECT. APPLY.
How are your friendships helping you achieve financial wellness? Or do you have unhealthy friends that might just lead to your financial downfall? Do you want to learn how to say no to user-friendly people?
