Second of two parts
THERE is a saying, “You can count your true friends on the number of fingers you have in one hand.” If you have counted more than that, chances are, you have over counted.
I remember treating a neighbor of mine when I was around 10-years-old. He was often tagging along with me wherever I go. I will buy him merienda and his favorite snacks from time to time. I even considered him as one of my BFF.
We were playing basketball with some of our friends and he was playing for the opposing team. One of his teammates deliberately pushed me and tried to bully me. I was expecting that he will come to my rescue.
I was terribly wrong. He turned his back against me and even said: “Bakit hindi naman kita pinipilit na ilibre mo ako!”
Ouch!!! That was one of my early rude awakenings that there are people who are around you because they can get something from you. But once you are useless, they will just dump you like an old rag.
That is the reason why I want to warn you that you should be careful who you are surrounding ourselves with. Are they friend or foe?
Let’s move on to the next four types of people who can spell disaster for your finances. If you want to check on the first four types, please check my previous article.
- The self-publicist
There’s a huge difference between having somebody who actually wants you to be part of their excitement when they purchase something and somebody who just wants to bring you along so he or she can show off! It’s really about the motive and intent. Some friends are known as self-publicists or show-offs. I wonder if you have someone like this in your circle?
Believe it or not, self-publicists love it when their friends are green with envy. And while it’s completely normal for people to feel a little jealous when their friends are acquiring stuff and having the time of their lives, it becomes not normal when you are surrounded with “friends” who enjoy it when you feel that way.
- The optimist
Being positive in life actually helps ease a few challenges. But when it comes to finances, you can’t be too careless about being positive because you could end up somewhere you don’t want to be.
The optimist friend can say, “Don’t worry too much if you go over-budget, life happens but you will recover!” or “Everything will be OK.” Financial optimists can be all sunny, sometimes, being too extreme about it.
While having a pessimistic friend doesn’t really bring you any good, having one who is too positive about things, especially money can just spell the same disaster.
- The meddler
You received a promotion at work and the meddler wants to know how much additional pay you are getting. You purchased a new handbag or a car, and the meddler wants to know how much they cost. The meddler does just that – meddling and getting his or her nose in your business. Do you have a friend like that?
Meddlers put themselves in charge of making sure they know exactly everything that’s happening and this information may be used as a means for measuring up, talking you down or even gossip – so be very careful about the information you disclose.
- The ‘always the better one”
It doesn’t matter how great things are going for you. You will always have that friend who will always be the better one! If you just bought your first car, this friend will get a better car than what you have. If you’re going on a vacation, his or her vacation will be a grander one!
The problem with these friends who think that they are always the better one is that you can go on a competition with them and that will put your finances in a very difficult situation. And even if you think your finances can handle the competition, this type of friends will never give up, no matter how perfect your life seems to be, they will always fashion a more flawless one. Bottom line is, you will never win.
Ok. Now that we have enumerated and defined the different types of friends that can spell disaster for your finances, I hope you will be more aware of the friendships you are keeping. Remember, nothing ever happens without our permission.
THINK. REFLECT. APPLY.
How can you safeguard your finances from friends who try to destroy it? Why is it important to filter the kind of friendships that we keep? Have you had financial troubles because of friendship? What valuable lessons have you learned from that experience?
“The only man who sticks closer to you in adversity than a friend is a creditor.” – Unknown
