DO not, repeat, do not give chocolates to President Duterte.
He’s allergic to chocolates. They turn his stomach upside down “in two minutes,” and “after I puke, I will pass out.”
It gets worse: “My face gets bloated.”
Unlike the former first lady, Imelda R. Marcos, who thrived on chocolates. Give her half a bar and her energy is instantly recharged. Like taking a brief nap, chocolates and candy are great picker-uppers; sugar rush, in other words.
The problem with chocolates is not just the people who should not ingest it, the trouble is with grocers who pass on their about-to-expire chocolates to innocent buyers, usually big corporations that order bountiful baskets by the hundreds for their favored clients at Christmas. The baskets contain canned goods, preserved jams and jellies, biscuits and crackers, and, yes, lots of candies and sweets that the HR department or purchasing manager has no time to inspect and scrutinize piece by piece. Even if they could, the goodies are sealed, and realistically speaking, is there time to examine the expiration date on each item?
What not to give at Christmas? In old-fashioned times when money as a conversation subject was taboo, well-mannered ladies and gentlemen considered it bad form to give cash. Times have changed so drastically that young people from three to 93 will say it straight to your face, “It’s more practical to give cash.”
Lorna was the most down-to-earth when it came to gift-catching. As she always reminded me, “If you’re giving me something for Christmas, I don’t need anything fancy. You know what I want.” (Where she is now, she doesn’t need gifts.) What she wanted from me was rolls and rolls of toilet paper, as many bundles as could fit in my little car.
Two weeks ago, another friend got the shock of her life when an associate of her boss sent her a beautifully wrapped box. Inside the box was a Rolex watch. Good for her, she didn’t pass out.
What’s the longest gift that keeps giving, month after month? Dental floss, endless miles and miles of it!
What’s the best gift to give? Something called forgiving. Best for giving at Christmas. See how it lightens your heart, for a Child is born!
