By: Rica Cruz
Hi Ms. Rica,
I need your help po. May nangyari sa amin ng officemate ko during one of our office outings. Since then, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. In fact, I wish na we could do it again. Feeling ko po, stuck na ko dito talaga. Kaso nga lang po, I’m married. I know that I shouldn’t even be asking this, but I want to know your opinion. Is this wrong po?
Thank you,
C
Hi C,
I appreciate the fact that you’re asking for my opinion on something this serious in your life. Pero, I am not here to judge you. My role here is to help you think about what you really want and what’s good for you.
In line with that, the fact that you’re asking me if there’s something wrong sa ginagawa mo means that kahit papaano, you think that it’s wrong. Ang tanong ko ngayon ay, sa tingin mo ba, stuck ka talaga? Or ginagawa mo lang itong excuse so you wouldn’t have to make any life-altering decisions? What is it about your marriage that you don’t want to face? Sa tingin ko, hindi ka-stuck. In fact, you have so many ways to go about this situation and all you need to do is to think about kung ano ba ang gusto mo talaga:
Avoid your officemate and ignore how you feel about him and move on;
Stick with your husband and ask for help.
Leave your husband and explore possibilities with your officemate.
Kung sa tingin mo na ang pinakagusto mo is the last option, then go do that. Once you’ve separated with your husband, baka you’ll be more comfortable with the fact that you’re excited about someone else.
Pero, kung sa tingin mo na mas may sense sa iyo ung unang dalawang options, then be prepared to put some distance between you and your officemate. Choosing to stick with your husband means that you have to be more open to him to fix what’s wrong in your marriage. You have to address that something that made you want to have sexy time with someone else, in the first place.
Kung gusto niyo, you can go to a professional for help. Couple’s therapy might be a good place for you to discuss these things. Malay mo, baka pag nakapagusap na kayo at naayos niyo ito, mas maeexcite ka na sa asawa mo, kaysa sa ibang tao! #takeitfromthesexymind
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me atwww.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Twitter or Instagram: @_ricacruz.
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Sex Therapist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.