By Rica Cruz
Hi Rica,
I am married and have been unhappy with my husband. Parang wala nang maganda sa aming dalawa. We don’t tell each other “I love you” anymore. We don’t kiss nor hug anymore. Kahit sex wala na. What should I do?
Unhappy Wife
Hello Unhappy Wife,
I am sorry that you’re having problems with your marriage. It’s terrible that you have to be in this kind of relationship. Although it’s normal to have down times in a marriage, it sounds to me that you’ve been on a low for a long time. The fact that you don’t kiss nor hug each other anymore is a sign that there’s something not right in the marriage.
Napagusapan niyo na ba ito? Have you already told him your feelings and observations about the marriage? How did he respond? Kung hindi mo pa siya nakakausap, it would be best to ask him how he feels about your marriage, then telling him about your side. Being open about this is the first step to understand the state of your marriage, para makapagdecide din kayo pareho on what to do about it.
Baka makatulong if you have that talk outside of your house. Find a quiet and neutral place where you both can sit down and talk about things. Kung hindi niyo kaya magusap honestly about this, it may be best to get the help of a professional. Couples counseling is beneficial for partners who have difficulties communicating with each other. You may broach the subject by telling him that you’ve observed that the marriage isn’t how it used to be, and that maybe, you need to go to counseling to figure out what’s going on. If he’s unwilling to go, it would still be helpful for you to go by yourself and have someone help you through this ordeal.
It is hard to be in an unhappy marriage. Minsan, nakakapagod when you do not feel loved nor appreciated. But, often, acknowledging the existence of the problem is the first step to a resolution. It does sound like you’re willing to change the situation, and that’s good. To move forward, know that you have to be as open and as honest as you can about your feelings towards your husband. That way, he will know what you’re going through and he can also open up about his thought and feelings. Just remember to accept what he says the same way that you want your views to be accepted. Respect is crucial in situations like yours. Hopefully, makapagusap kayo, and you’ll be able to come up with ways to revitalize your marriage and get that sexy spark back again! Good luck! #takeitfromthesexymind
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me atwww.facebook.com/TheSexyMind or DM me on Instagram: @_ricacruz.
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist, Marriage Counselor, and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Psychologist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.