Is your husband or wife an impulsive buyer? Does your spouse like to buy things that are not part of your budget? Is there a mismatch between your lifestyle and your spouse’s lifestyle?
One likes to save, and the other one likes to spend!
Side note: This is applicable to both husbands and wives who lack the discipline in handling their money.
Do you always find yourself having an argument with your spouse regarding money? Because he or she is buying things you don’t need, spending it irresponsibly?
Have you ever thought that your spouse doesn’t seem to care about how hard you work for the money that you have as a family? Has it gotten to the point where you’re already so tired of working for the luxurious living of your spouse?
My friend, relax. There is a way for you to minimize your struggle when it comes to your spouse’s spending habits.
First:
GIVE YOUR SPOUSE A MONTHLY SHOPPING ALLOWANCE
Yes, that’s right. Give your spouse a spending allowance which he or she can use for shopping. This is exactly what my wife and I have agreed upon – she has her own monthly spending budget, and I have my own.
Maybe the reason why your spouse spends left and right because you’re not giving him or her any monthly allowance – as a result, he or she thinks that his or her spending is unlimited.
And besides, you want your wife or even your husband to be presentable, right? Remember, how your spouse looks like is a reflection of his or her relationship with you.
If your spouse has neglected his or her self and outward appearance, this can be an indication that you are not taking of him or her well.
And I know for a fact that you don’t ever want that to happen. And of course, if your spouse always looks blooming, fresh, and stress-free, that says a lot about how you are taking care of him or her.
Second:
BE REASONABLE WITH YOUR ASSIGNED BUDGET
Maybe you did give your spouse a monthly spending allowance, but it’s not enough – not even enough for his or her gas and commuting expenses.
Or maybe the budget that you gave is too much – if this happens, your monthly budget for other things like grocery, education of the kids, rent, and others can suffer.
You need to be reasonable with your budget. Don’t be too stingy, and don’t go all out either.
Don’t take it against your spouse if he or she has a bigger spending budget than you. Remember, we all have different needs – maybe your spouse needs a bigger spending budget to be able to commute everyday to work. If this is the case, then so be it.
If you’re too stingy, your spouse will think that you are not giving the best for him or her. If you give far too much, your spouse can have the tendency to use material things as the measure for how much you love him or her. And so, this is why we need to strike a good balance. The two extremes will not do any good to our spouse.
Third:
STICK WITH YOUR BUDGET
With me and my wife, we’ve agreed that we will only give each other a spending budget every 30 days. If I spend my budget throughout the entire 30 days, that should be okay.
And if I spend all my spending budget in one day, that should be okay too. But of course, once we finish our spending budget for the month, we can no longer ask for more.
Your spouse needs to realize that you are willing to give him or her the best of everything, but within a budget. And this budget is something that you need to follow at all times. You yourself should be firm when it comes to the allotted spending budget for the both of you in a month.
Don’t let your monthly shopping allowance be the one to dictate whether or not you and your spouse are okay. And to wives (or husbands) who overspend, remember that the stability of your marriage should not be based on how much your spouse gives you for your monthly shopping allowance – this should just be a bonus.
THINK. REFLECT. APPLY.
Do you have a monthly shopping allowance for your spouse that he or she can spend freely? Is that budget reasonable?
Do you stick with your budget? (Chinkee Tan)