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MEDIA’s invention of “presumptive president” as applied to you-know-who – no wonder he insists on being addressed as Mayor – had the Political Innocent in Residence exclaiming that presumptively, Digong’s win will spell presumptive victory for Donald Trump in that parallel universe of our May elections and America’s November polls. (Once upon a time our elections were also held in November, but that’s water under the overpass.)

If “Mayor” is the presumptive president, there’s more reason to describe the VP race between Robredo and Marcos as a presumptive tie, to be broken once Smartmatic decides to let Elie Moreno and Marlon Garcia appear or not to appear before Congress. That hearing is sure to be both educational and an eye-opener, considering the jargon that has emerged from Senator Marcos’ camp as they pry the secrets out of Smartmatic’s machines (Hocus-PCOS to nonbelievers of automated elections).

Middle-agers and senior citizens who voted or did not on May 9 demand an explanation, in layman’s terms, please, from the two gentlemen from Venezuela, which as it happens if the cradle of universal and international beauty titlists, having perfected the art of cosmetic transformations that turn merely pretty girls into stunning queens on pageant night.

Although the two Venezuelans speak at least three languages – Spanish, English, computer – it was Comelec Chairman Andres Bautista who came off as linguistically precise when he said the alteration in the script – ? changed to ñ – was a cosmetic change that did not affect the count, a pronouncement seconded by PPCRV.

Cosmetic or epic change or changes, Marcos supporters and those who were not for him have every right to protest and show their outrage. Every vote, every voter counts; every vote should be counted, or what’s an election for? Marcos was leading by 900,000 at dinnertime of May 9, but by sleeping time, as the canvass slowed down, Robredo had overtaken him. Wide awake, DZRH and SWS exit polls – more accurate than commissioned pre-election surveys – put Marcos ahead, and so did overseas voters. Iglesia ni Cristo followers wondered how the vote was zero for Marcos in precincts where their people had cast their ballots.

Comelec owes more than 26 million voters of both candidates, and Smartmatic owes it to Comelec, their client, to air their side. Should we allow foreigners who tinkered with our elections to play hide-and-seek with Congress? How presumptive – er, I mean, how presumptuous!