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Troubled by a kiss

Dear Manay Gina,
I will start by saying I am happily married. One time however, during a fellowship, we in the office had some drinks.

A guy, who knows that I am married, kissed me. It happened because my thinking process was slowed by the wine. My question to you is: What do you think is the intention of a person who makes a move on someone who is married?

Also, I have been troubled by guilt at the thoughts I have when I think of him. Is it wrong to develop a crush even though one is married? I will never commit adultery and I love my husband. I also can’t imagine my life without him. I’m just worried about this incident.


Dear Jenny,
Save yourself some heartbreak and interpret things in the simplest way possible. Just as the drinks you consumed slowed your wits, the wine had emboldened him in the let’s-get-amorous department. He simply didn’t care that you were married and most likely was hoping for a fling.

On this thing about crushes, I suppose it’s also common with people who are married. However, I suspect what you’re really alarmed about is whether these fantasies represent the start of a slippery slope, where it’s all too easy to fall into a real life love affair. If you’re actually unhappy with your current relationship, that’s a different matter. But as you said, you love your husband. So just think of the incident as an effect of the wine that as you said, slowed your thinking process. My advice? Quit the wine!


Manay Gina

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“When in doubt, don’t.”

– Benjamin Franklin

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Send questions to dearmanaygina@yahoo.com (Gina de Venecia)