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What is a true friend?

By: Chinkee Tan

IN the world where friendship are just like ready to drink bottles, which are disposable, are just like instant coffee, which can instantly disappear, and are just like I-phones, which are user-friendly, you need to really find friends and partners who will be with you through thick and thin, who will jump off a cliff with you, go through fire with you, and save the last piece of biscuit for you.

It feels great to have people like this to be your friend.

These are the kinds of people who will be true to you, who will never leave you, who will be with you through thick and thin, through happy times and sad times. It’s possible for you to have a lot of friends, but to find even just one true friend is a real treasure.

So how can you know if your friend is a true friend? For me, a true friend is:

Someone who can tell me the truth even if it’s painful.

True friends can tell you that your breath stinks. They will not say things just to flatter you. But they will say things for you to improve and be better. They are bold enough to tell you the truth because they know that the truth will set you free.

Even if the truth hurts, but we should understand it will make us a better person. Often, these true friends can sound like our mothers and fathers who reprimand us. Why? Because they are concerned about us. Their care is genuine.

They don’t want us to get hurt, or get into trouble. Not to destroy us but to bring out the best in us.

Their truthfulness and honesty are rooted in love.

Their intention is to never hurt you, but to help you, to build you up and not tear you down, to bring out the best in you, and not to humiliate you. They will not pull you down, they will not push you to do what is wrong, and they will not put you in harm’s way.

It says in Proverbs 27:5-6, “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

This is why if you have a true friend by your side, take good care of that person. Thank that person for being a true friend to you.

A true friend is more valuable than gold or silver.


Do you have someone in your life who is a true friend? Do you think that you are a true friend to someone? What can you do for you to be a true friend?